【CLOSED/NSFW】☆ two idiots, one ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[bakudanma]

 
▶ CATCH-ALL SAKAZURA SINS WITH kaihentai 

or something ...

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[bakudanma]

<sub>[ It's a pleasant sleep, for the most part. Katsura could sleep hours more if he continued like this nad he wouldn't mind sleeping hours more.
Until, something rouses him to consciousness. An explosion— something that made his heart quake with fear and adrenaline to rush through his body.

Katsura is instantly throwing the blankets off of him and leaping out of the bed, landing on the floor with a spurt of vigor. ]</sub>

Sakamoto.
Hurry.
We have to evacuate the ship...

_{[ then, he sniffs the air. ]}

We don't have much time!
_{[ instantly, he's whirling around to the other side of the bed and grabbing Tatsuma by the wrist.
OBVIOUSLY WITH A SMELL LIKE THAT, THE SHIP WAS ON FIRE. ]}

[kaihentai]

[Okay, he really should move to console his boyfriend, but-]

Really? It smelled that bad?

[SAKAMOTO THAT IS NOT IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW]

1.2

[bakudanma]

_{[ RECORD SCRATCH..... ]}

2.2

[bakudanma]

—Ah.
_{[ Zura instantly drops his wrist and recoils, tucking his hands back into his sleeves. Don't scare him like that? ]}

I'll have none of that in here.
_{[ Even though this is technically Sakamoto's room? Better get ready for some changes to and in your room, Tatsuma.
Though, that was pretty loud and gross, so.. ]}

Are you alright?
_{[ HOW THOUGHTFUL. He's looking out for you! ]}

[kaihentai]

[Zura don't look at him like that?

His pride is wounded.]

I'm hurt.

[bakudanma]

_{[ He's hurt? Oh no.. Sakamoto must have really ripped one big time. This is obviously not what Zura wanted to wake up to, but he's worried.
Voice a bit panicked, he beckons with his hand slightly. ]}

A—Ah! You should call the medic then, Sakamoto!

Is there any bleeding? Do you feel light headed?

1/2

[kaihentai]

[!!!!!!!!

Someone is actually paying attention to him in a time of need! Does this mean that Zura wouldn't leave him to bleed out on the kitchen floor? Wow! Shock! Amaze! This is a great feeling...]

2/2

[kaihentai]

[So he's going to milk it for all it's worth.

What a con-man.]

A-ah, ahaha, yes! Very much yes!

[He presses a hand to his forehead dramatically.]

I'm feelin'... Faint.

[is that why ur nose is bleeding]

[bakudanma]

<sub>[ this piece of shit right here.

Of course, of all the people, Zura is going to worry over something as harmless as a fart.. because everything is serious with him.
Katsura rushes over to Sakamoto's side, placing his palms on his shoulders and encouraging him to sit down— but then.. ]</sub>

Is it okay to sit? Does it hurt to sit?
Ah.. how do I get medical attention for you?

[kaihentai]

[Sakamoto has to laugh at Zura's reaction. Only he would believe something this stupid.

The merchant plops onto the bed with a thud before reaching for one of Zura's hands and taking it gently.]

Sittin's alright.

[He doesn't need medical attention, Zura.

He just wants your attention.]

[bakudanma]

_{[ Well. That is a relief that he can sit.. but for how much longer?
Katsura feels his cheeks tint a very light color but he clears his throat, adverting his gaze to the side. ]}

—I can begin to assemble funeral arrangements for you.

_{[ KATSURA. IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS. ]}

And make your final days as enjoyable as you want them to be.
_{[ were.. his eyes beginning to tear up? ]}

[kaihentai]

[Most people would be very bothered by this, but Sakamoto is just determined to step up his theatrics.]

Ahhhhh, Zura~!

[He pulls the dark-haired samurai in with those obscenely defined arms, and buries his head in the other man's chest.]

I really think I'm dyin'.

[bakudanma]

_{[ ?????????? ]}

I won't allow it! Sakamoto!
_{[ ABSOLUTELY CLINGING. ]}

You can't! _{[ He can't have anything happen to you. You're the last person he is so attached to. ]}

If you die, I will die with you!
And I will arrange both of our funerals!

[kaihentai]

Yeah.

[This is all very sweet. Sakamoto can't remember the last time he's been in such close proximity with someone who actually expressed emotions in a normal, somewhat healthy way.

He looks up, his eyes earnest.]

My heart's been actin' real funny lately.

I dunno what that's all about.

1.2

[bakudanma]

Your heart?

2.2

[bakudanma]

That is at least twice as more important as your ***hole!
Sakamoto!
_{[ He jolts away. ]}

Why haven't you seen a doctor..!?

[kaihentai]

[How can Sakamoto smile so easily through all of Zura's distress.]

Stupid. ♥

What I got, it's not somethin' that fancy medicines and bigtime doctors can fix, alright?

Don'tcha get it?

[bakudanma]

_{[ Quietly, Katsura looks at him in the eyes, obviously concerned. His voice is soft and full of worry. ]}

N..No— does this mean that there isn't any hope for you..?
_{Ah, it's not stupid, it's Katsura.}

[kaihentai]

Listen.

[Earnestly.]

When it comes to this kinda thing, I'm not good at spellin' my feelings out.

[bakudanma]

SAKAMOTO!
<sub>[ The distress in his voice Is Real. He recoils, again, becoming louder and more hysteric. ]

[ Maybe Katsura was going to die alone after all. ]</sub>
Y—You can't say something like this so suddenly! Why haven't you told me..?

[kaihentai]

That I care about you?

[In a special way.]

Y'know, the others used to complain a whole lot. Ah, that Zura! He was always readin' in school. Keepin' up with homework 'n all that!

How come you're so literal, then? You couldn't tell?

I just wanted ta say somethin' nice.

[bakudanma]

<sub>[ He doesn't get it at first but then it suddenly hits him like a bolt.
Oh. He wasn't really dying— nothing was wrong with his heart.. it seemed like it was maybe some way for him to be affectionate to Zura? In an odd, Sakamoto kind of way.

Which is just perfect, but Katsura will have to get used to it.
Suddenly, Zura feels really silly.. ]</sub>

O—Oh. Ah. I see.
_{[ God. Calming down, now. ]}

Don't joke about things like that.
_{[ He doesn't sound stern, but makes a point that he means it. ]}

[kaihentai]

[He often jokes about things he shouldn't.]

Won't you come here? Now that ya understand.

[Sakamoto speaks in metaphors much of the time.

It makes things easier.]

[bakudanma]

<sub>[ Sakamoto often jokes and Katsura never does, so there is a problem right there. Not like it is a bad or big problem, but something they will have to understand about one another.

Kataura blinks, but takes a seat next to Sakamoto on the bed, looking at him inquisitively.
He clears his throat awkwardly and folds his hands neatly in his lap. ]</sub>

I'm glad it is nothing serious.

_{[ He's so scared that he'll lose you.
Not like Tatsuma needs to know the details about that. ]}

[kaihentai]

[Sakamoto smiles and turns to Zura, pressing his nose against the other's cheek.]

Yeah, me too! I wouldn't wanna leave ya all alone.

I know how much you'd hate that.